Archive for the ‘Who knows?’ Category
What Cannot End Us
Mark 16:17–18 NRSV
“And these signs will accompany those who believe…”
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These words are difficult. Very difficult.
They were spoken on Sunday and I found myself wishing I had not heard them.
They sound like promises of protection.
As if belief could shield the body from harm.
As if faith could prevent what we know, from experience, is not prevented.
I have lived too much to hear them that way.
Bodies fail.
Suffering comes.
Prayer does not always turn it aside.
I cannot wish them away.
So what are we to do with words like these?
Perhaps they are not describing a life without harm.
Perhaps they are trying—imperfectly—to speak about a life
in which harm is no longer the final authority.
They will pick up serpents.
They will drink what should destroy them.
They will lay hands on the sick.
It reads like invulnerability.
But it may be something else.
It may be the language of people who have come to believe
that even what wounds them
cannot end what has begun.
Not because suffering disappears.
Because the meaning of suffering has changed.
The cross remains.
The wounds remain.
The body still bears them.
And still—he stands.
If these words promise anything, it is not that we will be spared.
It is that what we endure
does not have the last word.
I cannot say this easily.
I have stood where this was tested.
But I cannot say that suffering is all that remains.
Something resists that conclusion.
Not enough to explain.
Not enough to prove.
Enough that I cannot call it final.
Perhaps that is what these words are reaching for.
Not protection.
But persistence.
Not safety.
I know one thing:
A life cannot be closed by what would destroy it.
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Prayer
God, when suffering speaks as if it is final, teach me to live as though it is not.
They Were Afraid
Mark 16:8 NRSV
“So they went out and fled from the tomb, for terror and amazement had seized them; and they said nothing to anyone, for they were afraid.”
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It ends there.
No appearance.
No explanation.
No resolution.
They run.
Not because they doubt what they have seen. Not because they have rejected it. Because something has happened that they do not yet know how to live inside.
The tomb is empty.
The body is gone.
The message has been given.
He is not here. He is going ahead of you.
And they are afraid.
We expect more from them.
We expect understanding. Composure. Something that resembles faith. We expect the story to move quickly toward clarity—toward proclamation, toward confidence.
It does not.
They say nothing.
Not because nothing has happened. Because what has happened has not yet become speakable. The world has shifted in a way that has no name.
Fear is not the opposite of faith here.
Fear is what happens when reality changes before we understand how.
We speak now with the advantage of distance. With language that has been shaped and refined and repeated until it feels settled. We say resurrection as if it were a word that resolves things.
It does not.
It unsettles them.
It unsettles everything.
The world is no longer something they can stand outside and make sense of. They are inside it now. And for a moment, there is no way forward except to run.
Mark does not fix this.
He does not soften their fear. He does not carry them forward into understanding. He leaves them there—mid-sentence, unfinished.
Because the story does not end with them.
It continues wherever it is being read.
We are not asked to move past their fear.
We are asked to recognize it.
Not as failure.
As the beginning of any honest response to a world that has already changed, even if we do not yet know how to live inside it.
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Prayer
God, meet me in what I do not yet know how to believe.
What Remains
John 20:19 NRSV “Jesus came and stood among them and said, ‘Peace be with you.’”
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The doors were locked.
Not symbolically. Not metaphorically. Locked in the ordinary way—secured against what might come next. Fear had not lifted with the morning. The kind of fear that can last for days. Or years. Whatever had changed had not yet changed enough.
They stayed inside.
Not waiting for revelation. Not expecting anything. Just holding together what remained of themselves after everything had come undone.
And then, he was there.
No entrance. The door did not open or break. No sound. No explanation of how a locked room could be entered. Only the quiet fact of presence where presence should not have been possible.
He stood among them.
Not outside the fear. Not beyond it. Inside the room where fear had settled and stayed.
They did not recognize him immediately.
Not because they had forgotten him, but because recognition still depended on the world making sense. And the world did not yet make sense.
So he did not begin with explanation.
He spoke.
Peace be with you.
Not as reassurance. Not as correction. As a naming of what was now true.
He showed them his hands.
Not to prove identity alone, but to locate himself within what they had witnessed. The wounds had not been erased. Whatever had happened had not undone what had been endured.
The body still bore it.
And still, he stood.
We often imagine that recognition is what makes presence real. That once we see clearly, everything settles into place.
But here, presence precedes clarity.
He is there before they understand how.
He speaks before they know what to believe.
He remains even as their fear lingers.
The room does not change.
The doors remain locked.
And still, something has shifted.
Not in circumstance.
In what is now possible within it.
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Prayer
God, help me trust what remains, even when I do not understand how you can be here.
What Walks Beside Us
Luke 24:15 NRSV
“While they were talking and discussing, Jesus himself came near and went with them.”
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Nothing had resolved.
The events that had broken everything remained intact. The loss was still loss. The questions had not answered themselves overnight. The world had not rearranged into something easier to live in.
And still, the day required movement.
They walked.
Not with purpose. Not toward a solution. Just away from what had happened, because staying in that place had become unbearable. The road offered distance, if not understanding.
They talked as they walked.
Not to arrive anywhere, but to keep the silence from closing in. They repeated what they already knew. Turned it over. Named it again. As if saying it enough times might change its shape.
It didn’t.
Somewhere along the road, another presence joined them.
There was no announcement. No interruption. No moment that marked the beginning of it. Only the quiet fact that they were no longer walking alone.
They did not recognize him.
Not because he was hidden, but because recognition was not yet possible. The mind was still arranged around what had been lost. There was no space yet for something else.
And still, he walked with them.
He listened. He asked questions. He allowed them to speak their confusion without correcting it. He did not rush them toward clarity. He did not announce what they were not yet able to receive.
He stayed.
And because he stayed, something in them stayed as well.
Not hope. Not yet.
But attention.
A willingness to keep walking.
A refusal to stop in the place where everything had ended.
This is the part we often miss.
Resurrection does not begin with revelation.
It begins with accompaniment.
Before there is understanding, there is presence. Before there is recognition, there is nearness. Before anything changes, someone walks beside us who was not there before—or who was, and we could not yet see.
The body sometimes knows this first.
A steadiness that wasn’t there before.
A quiet less empty than it should be.
A sense—difficult to name—that the weight is not being carried alone.
Nothing is resolved.
The road is still long. The questions remain unanswered. The past has not been undone.
And still, something has changed.
Not in the world.
In the company we keep.
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Prayer
God, walk beside me when I cannot yet recognize you.
What the Day Allows
Matthew 6:34 NRSV “Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
By then, days were no longer measured by intention.
They were measured by allowance.
What could be done without consequence. What would cost too much. What needed to wait. The body made these decisions before the mind could argue with them.
Getting out of bed was not assumed. Standing required a pause. Walking came with calculation. Even conversation had limits—how long, how much, when to stop.
This was not weakness revealing itself.
It was information.
The day did not ask for ambition. It asked for accuracy. To notice what was possible and stay within it. To stop before depletion. To rest without apology.
Jesus’ words are often misheard as reassurance. They are closer to instruction. Each day has enough—not more than can be borne, not less than is real. The work is not to overcome the day, but to live truthfully inside it.
There was no sense of improvement yet. No upward curve. Only the slow learning of how to inhabit a smaller life without contempt.
What the day allowed had to be enough.
Prayer God, help me attend to what this day allows, and not demand more.
On a whim... 